Keith Olbermann sets the record straight on 2001

Bush: Still a dilletante fraternity boy with no attention to detail. Goes with his "gut" and that's just not good enough.

A Little Samuel L. Jackson Flavor

You know the abbreviations you use when chatting online? The abbreviations might be:

• LOL (laughing out out)
• BRB (be right back)
• TTFN (Ta-ta for now)

Well if you add a little Samuel L. Jackson flavor to them they become much more entertaining:

• LOLMF (laughing out loud muther fuc$er)
• BRBMF (be right back muther fuc$er)
• TTFNMF (Ta-ta for now muther fuc$er)

See? They're all much better with a little Samuel L. Jackson flavor. Try adding a bit of SLJ flavor to your daily communications.

CUL8RMF...

The Great Cornholio

I always loved this episode.

Letter to a Preacher

Rev. Louis P. Sheldon
Traditional Values Coalition
139 "C" Street, SE
Washington, DC 20003
Phone: (202) 547-8570
Fax: (202) 546-6403

Dear Rev. Louis P. Sheldon,

It's nice to see a Christian organization support the president in his assertion that he has the right to vigorously interrogate (okay, some squeamish folks might call it torture) any and all potential enemies of this country.

I think it was Jesus himself who said "torture your enemies". Oh wait, Jesus didn't say that, but Lord knows He would if he had to face these enemies of freedom. He'd recant that "love your enemies" stuff in a heartbeat if He was here today.

For the lord was clear that we must NOT "turn the other cheek" and we are NOT to treat others as we'd like them to treat us. Wait a minute, that's not right either. Freedom isn't free! Eye for an eye. Kill 'em all! That's better. We're to do to them what they do to us -- or do worse first.

Look we have to interrogate these "people" (and I put them in quotes because they're not christians) to protect ourselves. The fact that it may lead to similar treatment of our soldiers is not the worry of this administration, or the church -- we're all to old to have to serve and thus don't have to be concerned.

In God I Trust,

Brad

P.S. When can we start burning witches, or at least stone a few gays to death?

Drinking & Nuns

A drunk guy is walking down the street. He sees this nun, runs up and knocks her over. He says, "You don't feel so tough now, do you, Batman!?"

Signs of the Coming Dark Ages

Sign #1: Southern Baptists -- Yes they're considering pulling their children from public schools because they don't like how homosexuals and science are represented in our schools. We're looking at an increase in tribalism and a decrease in the sense of being an American. Here's a great rant on the subject.

Sign #2: Conservative Islam -- That's right, they're lobbying for society at large to accommodate their "modesty laws." Read the article, it's crazy.

Sign #3: The Jesus Pan -- Yes you can cook your food while burning the cross and a likeness of Jesus into your food. How better to "take the body of Christ" than to pull his head off a pancake!

Forgive Me...

A man was being tailgated by a stressed out woman on a busy boulevard. Suddenly, the light turned yellow just as he approached the intersection . He did the right thing and stopped at the crosswalk, even though he could have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection.

The tailgating woman was furious and honked her horn, screaming in frustration as she missed her chance to get through the intersection.

Still in mid-rant, she heard a tap on her window and looked up into the face of a very serious police officer. The officer ordered her to exit her car with her hands up. He took her to the police station where she was searched, finger printed, photographed and placed in a holding cell.

After a couple of hours, a policeman approached the cell and opened the door. She was escorted back to the booking desk where the arresting officer was waiting with her personal effects. He said, "I'm very sorry for this mistake. You see, I pulled up behind your car while you were blowing your horn, flipping off the guy in front of you, and cussing a blue streak at him. I noticed the 'Choose Life' license plate holder, the 'What Would Jesus Do' and 'One Nation Under God' bumper stickers and the chrome-plated fish emblem on the trunk. Forgive me, but I assumed you had stolen the car."

Dr. Evil or General Hayden?

Dr. Evil makes an encore appearance as "Duh-bya's" nominee to head up the CIA..

Funniest Protest Poster I've Seen

Chicago Sportswriters, Hoosier Basketball & Hicks

Mike Nadel, a Chicago-based sportswriter, was speculating on the future of IU hoops while in Indy for the big ten tournament. While Mike was pontificating on the IU coaching situation, he failed to notice that IU Athletic Director Rick Greenspan sitting immediately behind him. Apparently he upset Mr. Greenspan -- especially his comment about Hoosiers being hicks. Or more precisely all but approximately three dozen Hoosier's are hicks.

So I decided to drop him a note, and much to my suprise, he wrote back immediately. My original note and his reply are shown below. The thread will make more sense if you read his article first.

My note to Mike:

I am one of the "three dozen" Hoosier non-hicks you apologized to in your column. I have an experiment I'd like you to try, and no it doesn't involve advanced flexibility or any of your orifices.

The experiment is simple: drive southwest out of Chicago for three hours. You'll find yourself in the middle of the same cornfields and farms that you see here in Indiana. In fact, central Illinois is even more backward than central Indiana. If not for Chicago, your entire state would be hicks.

The difference? Our hicks are smarter than your hicks. Illinois ranks 32nd among states in terms of educational achievement, while Indiana ranks 26th. That makes you guys just a bit smarter than the folks in Utah, and a bit dumber than those in Ohio. Ohio dude. You lost to Ohio. Other than Northwestern, your colleges are known more for the amount of beer consumed and the number of public nudity arrests than they are for academics -- or sporting success for that matter.

Lets talk sports. The Colts are better than the Bears. The Pacers can take the Bulls. Our minor league baseball franchise the Indians can probably take the Cubs 3 out of 5. No one cares about the White Sox or Blackhawks (hockey?). You have no motorsports to speak of, while we have the Indy 500, the Brickyard 400 and the Formula One race here.

All this said, you're welcome to visit any time. I'll buy you a drink or two and listen to you talk about IU basketball. I'll even point out any supermodel sports reporters sitting two seats away from us....

Mike's Reply:

Of all the angry notes I got from Hoosiers, Brad, yours was by far my favorite. You use a lot of good humor and make many good points. It was just me poking fun -- and anyone who read the piece saw that I poked more fun at myself than anything.

Yes, I do get away from Chicago -- and I've poked fun of "downstaters" and the "interesting" smells that come from the farms. Again, anyone who takes this stuff too personally has some problems.

I'd love to use your email in a future letters column. Please provide your hometown.

Thanks again for writing.

I look forward to seeing his forthcoming articles...

But Republican's Don't Care

More evidence that Mr. Bush purposely misled the country to start a war in support of a pre-determined agenda. The ends justify the means, right?

Keep your god out of my cartoons!

Newsflash! I am not of your faith, I don't believe in your religion. I don't have to follow your rules. In the civilized world "blasphemy" ceased being a capital crime centuries ago. Lighten up or my Rain God will flood you.

La Vida Cubicle

My emergency job replacement program.








Laptop, shrine to bride, and a bamboo plant.








Umbrella with tag "for the occassional shit storm"








Potrait of my idol, Scott Meyers. Zoom in for the autograph.
You can visit his web site if you like.

A real sense of humor...